Sunday, July 27, 2008

The X-Files: Can You Believe This Crap?

Any review of the new X-Files movie that gives it more than a C is written by someone who's high. Check out The Onion's AV Club website review for some funny comments, including this one, written by "Jessica the Dork":

SPOILERS (minor, and you won't care anyway, as the movie sucks):

That "It's all about your sister" line was so out-of-nowhere, you know there is no argument Scully doesn't play that card. "I asked you to buy milk. Why won't you ever buy milk? STOP LOOKING FOR YOUR SISTER!"

Funny because it's true, folks. At best, this movie had enough B-grade plot material to make a middling episode of the TV series' last three years. As it is, stretched to movie-length and shown in a movie theater, this is just pathetic. My X-Files fanfic, written in one sitting ten years ago or more, was more interesting than this. Echh.


PS - I must save this for posterity. It is a comment someone left on the AV Club's review. The comments, by this point, have degenerated into ripping on Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace. Here you go:

It is a time of uncertainty. the
empire's ambiguous tariff statutes
mandate close reexamination of
galactic export quotas. Interim
Princess Agoomba has co-chaired
a subcommittee to draft amendments
to existing trade policies.

Meanwhile, regulatory agencies
are being heavily lobbied by a
consortium of mercantile interest
groups and their suppliers to
streamline loading restrictions....

Hee hee! -ET

Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along AWESOMENESS

Anyone who hasn't seen Joss Whedon's Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog yet is absolutely missing out. Make sure you head to iTunes and pay the paltry $4 sum to view this coolness.

There are also some helpful folks out there who've transcribed the lyrics. Check them out.


Friday, July 18, 2008

The Dark Knight - Review and Review

Well, I saw The Dark Knight today, and I can say with a fair amount of confidence that it is just about the best superhero/comic book movie... ever. I may not feel that way six weeks from now--when I first saw Spider-Man 2, I thought that was the best comic movie ever, and now much about that film bugs the crap out of me.

Let me get my basic comments about TDK out of the way before I move on to the review of the reviews:
  1. Heath Ledger is AMAZING. There are many, many things for me to nitpick with the movie's portrayal of the Joker, but his performance is unbelievable.
  2. The Joker is SCARY. I've seen the word "creepy" used in several reviews, but I was genuinely scared of Ledger's Joker.
  3. The tension is, well, TENSE. And enduring. I'm not sure how well much of the film will hold up over repeated viewings, but for my first time seeing it... Wow. I was tired coming out of it--the movie just grabbed me and did not let go. I was absorbed completely.
  4. I still hate the Batsuit. If nothing else, give Batman a gray bodysuit so that we can actually SEE the title character. I believe it was Denny O'Neil who said "Batman is 50% style, and that style always comes from the artist." So it should be from the movies. Give me a Batman I can actually see instead of the great black blob. Ugh.
Okay. With all of that said, let's review some of the common comments from the reviews. I'm not going to quote here, as it's late, I wish to go to bed, and it's beside the point.
  1. "This movie is so dark/serious/complicated/grimngritty that it makes you forget that silly 60's show/Adam West/Cesar Romero/fun." Give me a damned break already. ANYONE who is still griping about the initially excellent 1960's Batman show: SHUT UP. Just SHUT UP. It's been 40 years. Batman is dark and serious--we get it. Never mind that the show saved the comics. Never mind that the show was better than the comics of the time, by far. Never mind that no one who has read more than five Batman comics believes that the show--that any incarnation--is the ONLY Batman. The first season of the TV show was perfect for what it was, and nothing more or less. Let it rest, and let those of us who can still enjoy it continue to enjoy it.
  2. "Heath Ledger makes Jack Nicholson look like a clown." Let's get this out of the way, okay? Ledger was given different material than Nicholson, and it was very different from Ledger's usual stuff. This is not to detract from Ledger's performance, which is brilliant. However, this is in NO way a Ledger vs. Nicholson debate. It can be a Batman (1989) vs. The Dark Knight (2008) debate, if you want.
  3. "The Joker is scary because he's an anarchist." In the words of the Human Ton and his sock-puppet Handy: Read a book! Even the writers/director of the film claim that the Joker represents anarchy. It might be more proper to label the Joker a sociopathic nihilist, and even then the labels could be better. Were the Joker in the film truly an anarchist, he wouldn't SPOILER have a third detonator. SPOILER
More complaints about the critics and the buzz may follow and be edited into the list above. Long story short: Go see the movie. It rules.


Blog Name Change

Since I've not been updating much and have not been updating the Spidey part much at all, I changed the name of the blog. There you go.


Friday, July 4, 2008

"Jar Jar, You're A Genius!"

If you aren't reading Darths & Droids and finding it very amusing (although not always "ha-ha" funny), then there's no talking to you. ;-)